"Not Even in my Dreams"

About a year and a half ago I came across a coupon in the newspaper for $100.00 off a spa treatment. After going through pages of ads to clip out favored coupons for 50 cents off this or dollar off that, a hundred bucks off something just blew me away!  Which got me thinking, if they were willing to take $100 bucks off their prices, how much were they charging to begin with??

 

As I kept flipping through the ads I came across similar large dollar coupons for other cosmetic treatments like facials, laser hair removal, spider vein treatments, and lasik eye surgery.

 

I did not need to clip and save any of those coupons.

 

But, the more I thought about it, the more depressed I got.

 

I have never been to a spa. 

I've never gotten a mani/pedi. 

I've never gone to get a massage. 

I've never gone to a hair salon to have it dyed or styled. 

I've hardly ever even gotten a haircut.

I have never been anywhere to be scrubbed, plucked, painted, or pampered....

 

It made me wonder what I was missing out on.  Now, I have never been part of a very affluent family.  The idea of spending any large amount of money purely on myself seems selfish and unheard of!  I have a hard time accepting (what I think to be expensive) gifts from my husband.  Much to our mutual frustration.  I haven't even splurged on new clothes in the last few years, and I had a baby since then! 

 

So, I feel that I have nothing in common with the kind of women who have experienced any of these pampering type services.  As I continued to ponder about it, I wondered if that made me any "less" of a woman.  All the advertisements seemed to imply that this was the kind of activity I was expected to indulge in at least once in a while.  *sigh* 

 

I forget what my husband did or said to cheer me up after all those depressing thoughts.  But I soon forgot all about it, and moved on with my life.

 

So, why bring it up now? 

 

Well, the other night I was having another one of the strange dreams that my latest medication dosage increase has been inducing, and I dreamt the following:

 

At some point late in the dream, I was somewhere, and ran into my mom. She was getting ready to check-in at a spa, along with one of my sisters.  Since I was there as well, my mother asked if I wanted to go to the spa as well, and she would pay for it.  After hesitating, I thanked her and declined because it seemed too expensive and frivolous to waste money on.  Besides, I think I was supposed to be running away from some bad guy, and I was trying to find my husband and kids....

 

So, when I woke up from this dream, the first thing I thought was, "Man!  I missed my chance for some pampering!"  *laughs*

 

*sigh* Not even in my dreams....

"My Life According to Dalyn"

A Challenge From Facebook:

Using only song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions. You can't use the band I used. Try not to repeat a song title. It's a lot harder than you think! Repost as "my life according to (band name)"



Pick your Artist: Myself --Dalyn K. Roney
Are you a male or female?: "Baby Girl"
Describe yourself: "Beautiful" "I Was An Angel" "The Lost Sheep"
How do you feel: "Emotions" "Insomnia"
Describe where you currently live: "My Garden, My Friend"
If you could go anywhere, where would you go?: "Before The Heartache"
Your favorite form of transportation: "Starkiss"
Your best friend?: "My Husband"
You and your best friend are: "We Are Worth It"
What is the weather: "Sunrise"
Favorite time of day: "And What Comes From Darkness"
If your life was a TV show what would it be called: "Dazed" "Incorrect" "The Poet's Problem" "The Hard Way" "Hobbies" "The Way" "Even So"
What is life to you: "My Legacy" "The Wheat and the Tares" "When All Has Been Forgotten"
Your relationship: "Every Day" "You Are Mine" "A Duet" "Now" "Forgive Me, For I Love You"
Your fear: "Sadness" "You're Gone" "I Miss You"
What is the best advice you have to give: "Dance in the Rain"
Thought for the Day: "He's Here For Me and You"
My soul's present condition: "Testimony" "I Fell at His Feet" "Can I Do What He Asks" "Thy Servant"
My motto: "Even Mountains Need a Foundation" "A Hui Hou"

"The 3's of Me"

Three names I go by:
1. Dalyn
2. Mommy
3. Sister Roney

Three Jobs I have had in my life
1. Merrill Stage Equipment - Labor, Clerical, Sanitation
2. Royalty Auto Care -Administraitive Assistant
3. Demented Dragon (Manga Publishing Co.) - Personal Assistant to Publishing Editor

Three Places I have lived
1. Indianapolis, IN
2. Plano, TX
3. Indianapolis, IN

Three Favorite drinks
1. Milk

2. Water
3. SOBE

 

Three TV Shows that I watch
1. Grey's Anatomy
2. So You Think You Can Dance
3. Anything Food or Animal related

Three places I have been
1. United States - all over
2. Canada - To see Niagra Falls
3. Mexico - Tiajuana, Mexico

People that text me regularly
1. Michael
2. Twitter Friends (Twitter + Peeps = Tweeps)
3. Facebook Friends

Three of my favorite foods
1. Milk
2. Chocolate
3. Anything with meat and noodles/rice

Three friends I think will respond
1. uh, ....
2. ....not really....
3. ....expecting it.

Three Things I am looking forward to
1. Culinary School
2. My next Date with my husband!
3. Eternal Life with my family

Three Wishes
1. Quality alone time with my husband
2. Happy Family
3. Culinary School

"Children grow so fast!"

Anyone that has had children in their life knows how quickly their little bodies change and their intellect grows! Here are some pictures from this passed week. =)

It has been a crazy week. Six days ago, we began the big move out of our little Townhouse apartment, and into the Master Bedroom Suite of the three bedroom house we are renting and sharing with family.

The children have been amazing. The first day we moved most of the bedroom and bathroom things. Just what we would want over the weekend. The kids have each of their beds, some toys, movies, and a whole new house to explore! They have taken everything well in stride, which made the transition MUCH easier on me!

Ireland is two and a half, deviously destructive, and fiendishly clever. Scotland is nine months, and exploiting his new found crawling, climbing, and standing skills. Michael is still working nights as a courier, while doing his translating work on the side.

I have greatly enjoyed my time as a stay-at-home mom. It has been both trying and a blessing. Many times I have wished I could "clock out" from being the full-time Wife and Mommy 24/7. My demanding little cherubs are exaughsting and downright mean to me sometimes (can anyone say 'Parental Abuse'?).

But at the same time, I have enjoyed countless hours snuggling, nursing, and discovering the world through their bright child eyes. We have laughed and played, and I can't get enough of their big grins or their kissably tiny toes.

They have grown tremendously.

But, as soon as this move is completed, I hope to get started with Culinary School. In a year or two, I hope my husband can take some time to be a Stay-At-Home Dad, and work more on his writing. And I hope to spend my days crafting towering, edible works of art. :D

So, I just wanted to document a bit of our life right now. Because it will all change in the next blink of an eye. Hopefully, for the better.

"My Little Dare Devil"

When we moved into our new house over the weekend, we inherited some hand-me-down furniture, including a new King-size bed. I absolutely love it!

If you were to read my previous blog post "I want my own bed", you'd know we were having issues before. Well, it turns out that a bigger bed made all the difference.

We noticed the very first night that there was room in our bed for my husband and I, the baby when he was nursing, the two year old that wouldn't stay in her bed in the middle of the night, and the cat who would inevitably join us! Wow!

So, what does this have to do with Scotland? Well, the benefit of our old bed, was that it was just a couple mattresses on the floor. That was a convenient height for both of our children to easily climb up and down. Falling off the bed was also not a big deal.

Our new bed has an actual bed frame, and sits much higher off the ground. This hasn't posed too much of a problem for my 2yr old. But, my 9mo old can certainly not get up and down by himself. This is very frustrating for us.

I still do not know what the best solution is. But here is my point:

I was lying in bed after nursing, and my 9mo old was crawling around, looking for toys or mischief. He apparently decided to get down on the floor. Instead of falling and getting hurt, which previous experience had taught him was no fun, he tried a more daring approach.

Scotland crawled to the edge of the bed, peered over to get his bearings. Then swung his legs over the edge. I, of course, panicked that he would get hurt. Before I could come to his rescue, I noticed he wasn't falling. He was holding himself up by gripping onto the bedding.

He stayed suspended in midair, gripping the bedding, his body facing the bed. He totally paused with a "Hey, Mom! Look at me!" grin on his face. Then slid down the blankets to the floor with a safe gentle bump. After a brief moment to revel in his own genius, he crawled off in search of more fun.

I sat there, amazed.

But, with nothing else to do, lay back down and relaxed. As I kept a sleepy watch over my toddling son, I couldn't help but feel thankful that he is starting to be able to take care of himself.

One day, I won't have to keep a constant vigil over him. I long for that freedom! But, I'll try to remember to enjoy these small moments for now. *grins*

"Breaking"

I wrote this one evening as I had reached my limit, dealing with my stressed husband trying to rush off to work, and dealing with my two demanding, screaming, sometimes downright abusive and mean to me children.

I know my kids are small, and I need to try to teach them to behave nicely, but that task is soooooooo overwhelming sometimes. How am I supposed to teach something that I don't always master so well myself? I try to cut myself some slack, and point out that any parent is only human, and we are all failable. But I still want to be the very best parent, person, and Dalyn that I can possible be!!! And that much stress is bound to make a person break down at times.

This was one of those times. Not only did everything seem like it was falling apart, but I felt trapped in this hostile situation. I even felt guilty for longing a bit to return to the days when I was a newleywed without children.

And all that stress,
hostility,
guilt,
longing,
pressure,
and overwhelming sadness,
is enough
to make anyone
feel like they are breaking
a little bit inside.



"Breaking"
By: Dalyn K. Roney

The pain is tearing me up inside.
The madness is forcing me to cry.
And the noise is screaming in my brain.

The tragedy of freedom past.
The insanity of chaos massed.
The anger and the torment never relent.

I feel the conflict eating me whole.
I sense the danger of losing control.
I fear the consequences unknown.

But I am at wit's end.
And I don't know where to turn instead.

I feel like I am breaking.

Puppy Dogs

After recovering from the shock that I was pregnant with my second child, I got excited about having another girl. I envisioned the baby dresses I could un-pack from storage. I purchased a pink Baby Book. After already having one daughter, I felt sure I could handle a second.

When I found out my second child was going to be a boy, I knew that things would be very different. I was entering un-known waters. But I tried to keep an open mind and get to work.

First, was to go through all the baby clothes and hand-me-downs. I boxed up what was "too girly", and set aside the generic stuff for baby two to wear.

I noticed right away that most boy clothes were either covered in sports themes, puppies, or dinosaures. I was even given an outfit with a dinosaure playing sports! (Which was my favorite outfit until he grew out of it...)

I like dinosaures, so that was good. I've never been very into sports, so I gave most of those items away. And then came the puppies....

What is it with boys and puppy dogs? I'm a cat person myself. My daughter had several cat themed outfits. But all the cat clothes seemed too girly for my son. So, I resigned my little man to having a few puppy things, but that was it.

Until he was born.
Then the puppies flooded in.

First was a fuzzy blue dog from the hospital gift shop with the words "My First Puppy" stitched on a paw. Too cute! So, that was a keeper. Then came more puppy clothes, more blue dogs, and even a miniature of Clifford, the Big Red Dog. Not only that, but any time my daughter came across a toy puppy she'd automatically hand it to her little brother (awe!), thus re-enforcing the puppy thing.

It was quickly apparent that it was out of my controle. Which turned out to be okay, since my son seems very athletic, and likes all the puppies. So I guess they are here to stay.

"For One Small Moment"

I wrote this for my husband one night...
I thought it was too tender to not share.
It's nice to show when we get along at times. *grins*

"For One Small Moment"
By: Dalyn K. Roney

For one small moment
Everything is right with the world.
The children are sleeping
And the husband is home.
We're lying in bed together
And he just holds me.
No one between us.
No children with their toys and blankets,
Or the cat with her fickle claws.
Just my husband and me
Snuggling close
Under the blankets.
He's already asleep.
But I'm content
To steal this moment
And fix it in my mind.
So, next time we're seperated
By Life's madness,
And the kids are all screaming,
And I look up to the Heavens
And think, "why me?",
Then I'll have this small moment
To remember how great it all is,
How worth it, and wonderful.
And even if I feel too lucky
That you love me
And I wonder, "why me?"
Out of everyone else on this earth.
I snuggle closer in your arms
And thank Heaven for this
One small moment
We have
Together.
*kiss*

I want my own bed!

Before I got married, I was talking to a friend on the phone when my cat jumped up in bed with me. My friend asked, "Why do people let their pets sleep in bed with them?" I replied, "So they don't have to be alone." It was nice to have a friendly little warm body to snuggle with on cold lonely nights. But I was honestly just biding my time until I got married and had a husband to snuggle with instead.

Fast forward six years or so and I now have a husband that works nights, two children, and another cat. With my husband gone at night, my kids and I frequently snuggle in my bed until they fall asleep. Since my 6mo old nurses several times throughout the night, the baby often just stays in bed with me. So it's hard to justify making the 2yr old sleep elsewhere too. And by the time they are BOTH asleep (a very rare occurrence indeed!) I often just scoot them over and try to catch an hour or so of sleep myself.

But the quality of sleep I get that way is very poor. It's difficult to get much REM sleep when you can't sleep in your preferred sleeping position. It is also difficult when you wake up every time one of the babies rolls over or whimpers in their sleep. A toddler that kicks and pulls hair doesn't help much either.

And even when it's just my husband and me in bed, my hair is so long that he sleeps on it sometimes, and it yanks my head, and I get a headache. Besides, with him in bed, I can't sleep diagonally, which really is the most comfortable way.

That is why there are times when I want my own bed. Maybe those 60s sitcom couples who slept in separate twin beds had the right idea...

Meanwhile, what happens when my poor husband gets home from a long night at work, and his bed is covered with two kids, a wife, and a cat? Well, even when I do manage to get the kids tucked in their own beds before he gets home, one or both of them will wake when he comes home, so it was a small victory. So we sleep in shifts when we can...

Ahh, parenting... *yawns*

Fighting

There are lots of different kinds of fights. Sports competitions are fights. Haggling with a merchant to get a better deal on something is a fight. Any parent knows that every day is a fight. War is obviously a fight. Families fight. Countries fight. Sometimes a bit of healthy rivalry is good for comradery or the marketplace. But when it comes to verbal fights there are a few universal truths:

There are two sides to every story.
Sometimes more.

Everyone thinks they are right, and they want their way.

And they want a "compromise" that works out the best for themselves.

Now, a mediator might say that a good compromise is one that no one is completely happy with. Because that means that everyone had to relinquish something in order for the compromise to take place. Others will say a good compromise is one where everyone leaves thinking they got more of their way than the other guy, and so they are happy.

But when you step back from a fight you are in, completely believing that you are right, and you have the right to be right, and your compromise up to this point has been to try to be patient while waiting for the other party to admit that you are right, and do what you wanted...

When you step back and ask yourself, "Am I really right? Or just being selfish because I want my own way?" How in the world do you find the answer??? ...

-------

I started this last week.

I kept it back thinking I would have more to add later. But I realized that I do not. I still don't know what I am supposed to do. *sigh*

.. When you fight, sometimes it is better after because you get things out in the open, so you have a chance to deal with them. If you're having a problem and now you can both work on a solution, then that is a good thing. But more often than not, everyone just feels sad that there was a fight at all. And it's exaughsting.

As a mother of a strong willed daughter in her terrible-twos, I am so tired of any fighting...

But for what it's worth, the fight between my husband and I that sparked this blog in the first place? I still absolutely believe that I am right, I have the "right" in this case to get my way, and the whole family would benefit from it.

But I still also feel a bit selfish for holding out until I get my way.

Life is so complicated.

Becoming a character - Part 1

I don't know at what point I realized it, but it has been pretty obvious for quite some time that Klingons and Star Trek would be a big part of my marriage. My husband started learning tlhingon Hol a short time before he met me, and it fascinated him as a linguist. He has since translated many things into the language (even getting PAID to do it!), and has studied the culture.

A few years ago he purchased a Klingon costume from some website, but hadn't consulted me first. Assuming for a generous moment that if he HAD asked me first that I didn't immediately say no, then I like to think that I would have helped him put our money into a better costume than what he ordered.

When we got it in the mail the first obvious flaw was that it looked like a Halloween costume you might buy at Wal-Mart. Cheap fabric, foam, and pleather with faded painted designs. :-/

Now, I'm not saying that to be mean. We've gotten some mileage out of it, and he's worn it to a few events. But the time has come to REALLY vamp it up as the Trekkies unite for the Star Trek movie premier in a couple weeks. Woo.

Of course, we didn't start the process until today. Not enough time? Nothing a lot of money can't fix! -- ... But we don't have a lot of money... Lame. But we DO have some ingenuity and resources, so maybe we can pull it off! My goal is to tweak what I can.

Trouble is, I come from a Theatre background, and a family of complicated over-achievers! So it is pretty hard to JUST tweak anything. It's WAY more fun to pull together and facsimilate something totally AWESOME! ... So we're trying.

Today I looked at reference material and made some calls to meet with my favorite make-up artists -- my parents. I detached a decal from the costume that had been manufactured upside-down, so I can attach it correctly. I also detached the mock knee boots from the cheap black pants it came with so my husband can wear them over his boots and some real pants. That alone will kick the over all look up a notch. I also have hopes of attaching some metallic pieces, scavenging for some gloves and a sash, and making a better belt buckle.

But the REALLY AWESOME accomplishment of the day was the creation of a Klingon forehead and nose prosthetic! Here is how it went:

1. Call Daddy and ask him very nicely if he is available to help with a prosthetic and pay him back with gratitude and Welch's Grape Juice.

2. Meet up and discuss options.

We talked about going the Alginate, Plaster, and Latex Mold route a few years back, but the effort required lead to never doing it. Today my Father offered an option involving building the prosthetic directly onto the actor. Sweet.

3. Assemble supplies:
Liquid Latex
Cotton balls
Tissue paper
Yarn
Tulle (sp?) That decorative netting you see at weddings.
Powder - for removal

4. Trimmed a piece of Tulle to the desired size of the prosthetic; covering the forehead. Should have also cut it to cover the nose, but forgot.

5. He put a bit of liquid soap along the hair line to help with removing the finished product.

6. Used a flat knife (Latex spatula was missing) to apply a thin layer of Liquid Latex to the skin.

7. Applied the pre-made Tulle base. This acts to give the piece stability, and keep it from falling apart when it it removed. It's kind of like the steel mesh used to reinforce a slab of concrete.

8. Then add Liquid Latex where you want to build up the prosthetic, and create the shape you want using cotton balls, tissue, yarn, or what have you.

To clarify: add a small amount of Liquid Latex to the immediate spot you want to attach the cotton ball to, to make it stick. Stretch it out or whatever to get the desired shape. You can apply more latex and materials to build it up, or take it away. As you go, Apply more latex over the cotton balls, and shape as desired. Repeat over the rest of the forehead or whatever until finished.

An artistic sensibility would be good here. You are limited only by your imagination. Checking frequently in the mirror will also help as you can make adjustments until the latex starts to dry.

9. Let the whole thing dry in place. How long depends on how much material was used. Our piece needed at least an hour or so. We could have waited longer, but my husband had to go to work.

10. Slowly peel the whole piece back off, working from one corner to another. It hurts like a large bandage being ripped off. If you got hair in it, it will hurt more. Powdering it lightly as you go will help to keep it from sticking to itself.

11. Once off and dry enough, store in a zip top bag. The fine line to walk is you do not want the prosthetic to dry out, as it would become too brittle, and break. That would be very sad.

When the time comes to put the prosthetic back on for the event:

1. Trim or adjust anything to clean it up a bit.

2. Apply the prosthetic with Spirit Gum. You may also want to have Spirit Gum Remover handy for later.

3. Use facepaint to blend it in with the rest of the actor to achieve the desired look. Artistic ability needed here too.

This is the kind of thing where practice will make perfect. I only applied some finishing touches to today's prosthetic, as the rest of the time was spent caring for our children. I declined creating a forehead for my 6mo old son at this time.

I think it turned out well. I would have done a few things differently, but next time. Before we started, my Father asked my Husband how long we'd like the prosthetic to last. My Husband said he would wear it until it fell apart. My father said that could be three minutes. I said we'd probably like to get a dozen events out of it. I don't know if it will last that long. But I am confidant that I can build another when the time comes. Obviously, there are better/more "professional" ways of making prosthetics (remember that Alginate and Plaster method?), but this will work great in a pinch. =)

... Now to finish the costume.

And we haven't started on mine yet. Apparently I get to paint myself green. That will be the easy part. Finding a modest costume will be the hard part. And do I really want the attention? ... That should be interesting.

But that's a blog for another day.

Love is easy. Marriage is the hard part.

My handsome husband and I just celebrated our five year wedding
anniversary. So, for the past couple weeks, I have repeatedly found
myself constantly reflecting on the many things that have brought us
here. If I ask myself, "Is it everything you thought it would be?"
then I am surprised that the answer is, "Not really."

Now, before anyone freaks out (Michael), I must state that my
conclusion is based on the fact that I was pretty unprepared for
marriage before I got married.

Oh, I'd known my husband for about two years by that point. We'd had a
lengthy engagement, and we'd gotten to know one another very well. My
husband proposed to me FOUR TIMES -- I most certainly thought
everything through that I could think of; repeatedly!

We both loved each other, had very similar values and goals in life,
but came from different enough backgrounds that our life experiences
helped to complete the other. The chemistry was pretty awesome too. ;)
Always very important!! *laughs*

No, I knew then before we made that journey together that I had fallen
in love with the best man I have ever known. That he would love me,
and take great care of me. And that he would be a good father one day.

As we knelt across the alter from one another that beautiful spring
morning I was happier than I had ever been in my whole life! I have no
idea what the guy said to us during the ceremony -- I really wish I
could remember. :-/

My wedding day and reception had its glitches. This or that didn't go
as planned. But I was so happy and entranced, that the little misshapes
just flew over my head and didn't bother me. The most important thing
was that we'd made it to the alter safe and sound. No matter what
happened next, it would all be okay... =)

... But throughout the following days and weeks after I came up for
air from the newlywed-ness of our lives, I began to ask myself a
startling question:

"So, what happens now?"

The twenty years of my life before my wedding had prepared me mainly
for just that -- the wedding. I mean, every fairytale, movie, novel,
and most Sunday School lessons had ended with "You get married, and
then Happily Ever After."

I was raised on Disney movies, I knew the drill: drama, meet, drama,
fall in love, drama, a few romantic moments, a heart-wrenching plot
twist, a bit more drama, then marriage! Yay! Cue the music and the
ending credits...

But now what?

I must admit that I was a bit irked that I didn't have much to go on
at that point. I mean, we had jobs, a little apartment, and were
making ends meet. I knew how to cook, clean, host parties, mend and
sew, and fix his tie and collar. Wasn't that the definition of a good
wife?

Well, lets just say that the "Get out of Jail Free card theory" about
life after the wedding did not pan out. I knew THAT the morning after
we got married, when I baked cinnamon rolls, bacon and eggs, and hot
chocolate for breakfast, and he came out and said he just wanted some
cold cereal. :(

I guess what I'm trying to say is that Love is easy, and Marriage is
the hard part.

When you are just dating, you only see each other at your best. You
took time to look cute. You clear your schedule. You try your best to
be fun and engaging. You still live with your parents, so you have few
bills or responsibilities. So, you get to spend most of the money you
make on going out with each other. Anyone can be fun when there aren't
major responsibilities attached.

But you don't get any of the fun parts of married life when you're
just dating, either.

With marriage comes being around each other ALL THE TIME. It only
sounds good before it happens. Suddenly you're not always cute and
witty. Now you also spend time together when you're feeling ugly and
tired. And if The Pill is now part of life, then chances are you're
hormonal and out of sorts too. No fun. Seriously.

Then there's Rent, utility bills, no parents to wake you up for work,
or clean up after you. Being an adult is a lot of work! Now that you
need to be financially responsible, there is less or no money to go out
to eat, or see a movie. You find yourselves at home all the time,
tired, bored and stressed out.

This is the point when you find out what your relationship is made of.
If you are able to not get pregnant right away, then you get to spend
time together just the two of you, and work a lot of things out. You
get to learn and mature together. You share life's struggles and
experiences together.

When babies come along you never get to sleep or spend time alone
together. And now EVERYONE is hormonal, tired and stressed out! Aaaaa!
:(

But you also have this wonderful bundle of joy complete with
irresistibly kissable toes, and cuddly little bodies to hold close to
your heart as you rock them to sleep. Children remind you what it was
like to be a child yourself, and teach you what your parents had to
put up with as you were growing up.

With marriage comes the love, trust, comfort, stability, and safety of
being with the one who you know will watch your back, take care of
you, and bring you back to your senses when you need it.

And when you're together, everything is better then any other time.
You can feel the love and joy from head to toe, drop all defenses and
pretenses, and finally find comfort and peace. =)

If you are able to each do your part of the chores, take care of the
other's needs, be willing to pick up the slack when the other is down,
and help them back up again, then you can be good together.

You need to both be honest and try to communicate to avoid problems
before they happen. You need to constantly be compromising with one
another to reach your goals. You need to try to bring out the best
qualities in the other, and help them feel complete.

You need to be strong enough to call each other out when you mess up,
so you can patch things up before they get blown out of control. You
need to love each other more than yourself, and protect them from
worry and doubt by behaving and acting with integrity. You need to
speak up when you're having a problem so they can step in and help you
out. And you need to appreciate each other. Recognise and praise them
for their efforts, and remind them to notice yours.

Marriage is a tempering, ongoing process. Like a fine sword that must
be heated, beaten, and reheated to create the many layers necessary to
forge a strong blade. The countless experiences, both good and bad,
that you hurtle together, will temper, forge, and strengthen your
foundation as a couple. =)

I love my husband so very much! We have overcome just about every
obstacle a couple can go through in our seven years together. We
aren't wealthy, but we have a comfortable little home, we've been
paying off our debt, and we have two beautiful little children. I am
very very blessed.

So, is it all everything I thought it would be?

No.

It is, by far, better than I had ever imagined.